Auction: The lost bid

lost a bid last week

cried and stomped and my computer i did beat

thought about self harming

staring at scared flesh already dark and bleak

talked to Biki and screamed at Elsa -eliza

and yes they are dolls

they put things into context and backchat when I’m on the brink

daemons snigger and hug me tilting my head up, all eyes leering towards the fridge, as i fight the urge to drink; it makes things swirl and spike or slow right down…down with full force teeth bites

blood thins and brain sleepy so i don’t have to think , why can’t i cope with normal everyday things…?

then i picked up a pencil and drew a quick sketch,

with first words that come to mind

pissed off



urges still strong, tension headache and tired

but ultimately I’m spurred on and inspired

hopefully one day my dolls/figures will fill people with emotion

and cause fights…. to be acquired.





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